Monday, May 19, 2008

Top Ten Signs You've Been in Karaganda Too Long



Speaking of numbered lists, apologies to David Letterman, and thanks to Laura for the creative inspiration and assist...

Top Ten Signs You've Been in Karaganda Too Long

10. You can't function in the morning until you've ingested 20 minutes worth of second-hand cigarette smoke.

9. (Ladies only) Thigh muscles no longer sore from 'hovering'.

8. You have worn the magnetic strip off of at least one ATM card.

7. The baby house gives you your own office space, and asks you to conduct orientation briefings for newly arrived PAPs.

6. You no longer flinch when confronted with near-death experiences in or near a moving vehicle.

5. The internet cafe gives out your cell phone number to locals with technical support problems.

4. Your hands no longer have fingerprints due to repeated, clumsy attempts at lighting a gas stove.

3. Old Kazakh women peek into your grocery bag and ask where you got those fantastic-looking beets and turnips.

2. Just prior to your court date, the Baby House Director puts her arm around your shoulder, gives you a sympathetic hug, and offers you a chocolate candy.

1. Ramstore entrance guard greets you by name with a big smile and a fist-bump.

I'd be interested in hearing other suggested signs from our visitors, as well.

1 comment:

Amy said...

Oh my god....so funny.